We recently filmed a video called “Flirting, Foreplay, and Fantasies” because in all of our time doing what we do…
…we have seen thousands of couples limit their sexual satisfaction inside of their marriage because of laziness, fear of rejection, or a lack of education about how their bodies work. We want to help you break through the sexual ceiling and experience something amazing together; truthfully, we want amazing sex for all of you! So, as a teaser to our video that we hope you watch, here’s something to get you started.
The truth is that the limitations set on your sex life are self-inflicted. You and your spouse get to write the guidebook for length of time, verbiage, new elements or toys, the whole sha-bang… and that starts with flirting. Let me break through the first sexual ceiling for you right here: Flirting is not just for love-struck teenagers. In fact, marriage is the “big leagues” for flirting and if you’ve got real game, you’d know that it can be incredibly seductive and can act as both an emotional and a physical intimacy builder. So, if you’ve stopped flirting with each other, your first step is re-teaching yourself how.
TIP: Don’t throw away the basics. Compliments and playful banter go a long way. You can always change the content, but don’t do away with the methodology!
Moving right into the second sexual ceiling for you: Did you know that foreplay is a process, not an event? It’s true!! The word “foreplay” is meant to explain the prelude to the climax of sexual intimacy between you and your partner and everything positive you do for each other can be included in the foreplay arena. When done correctly, foreplay can enhance your sexual intimacy like nothing else.
I want you to mentally imagine the stretching and snapping of a rubber band. If you were to pull back the rubber band only a little bit and then let go the “snap” would be anticlimactic and not very satisfying. But, if you were to pull back the rubber band as far it could go without breaking and then let go… the snap would be incredibly satisfying. THIS is how foreplay works. You can spend 10 minutes beforehand and get a little spark, or you can spend all day teasing each other and building toward something explosive.
TIP: Think back to the best sex you and your spouse have ever had. Take notes. What was the day leading up to it like? Why did the events of your day create amazing sex?
Here’s our third sexual ceiling to break through: FANTASIES DO NOT HAVE TO BE PORN. There, we said it. It breaks our hearts to see so many couples refrain from talking about their sexual fantasies because they’re afraid that if they do not include bondage, whips, threesomes, or other stereotypes… they aren’t “sexy” enough. This is not reality and not healthy. Please stop allowing societal stereotypes to keep you from having amazing and satisfying sex with your spouse.
TIP: Have a conversation with your spouse about what you really want to try and see where it goes.
Written by Anna Collins