Congratulations! You’re engaged to the love of your life. Now what?
Being engaged is undoubtedly one of the most exciting and also stressful times in a couple’s life. Wedding planning is in full swing and the anticipation of what is to come is high. Here are some tips to help you prepare for your big day and every day after!
Don’t let wedding planning take over your relationship.
While your wedding day is sure to be beautiful and worth all the effort, it is also only ONE day, while your marriage will continue every day after. So focus most of your attention on setting yourselves up to have a strong foundation for a happy and healthy marriage!
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Connecting Question: What is something non-wedding related we could do together this week?
Do pre-marital counseling.
Every individual on the planet comes with his or her own baggage, and unless otherwise dealt with, that baggage will come with you into your marriage. When you bring a baby into this world, you spend months nesting and preparing for that little one’s life. Pre-marital counseling is literally “nesting” for your marriage and it’s the #1 way to give your marriage a strong foundation. This is also a time for you to continue to look for “red flags” so that you know exactly what you are getting into before you officially say “I Do”. We have a great online pre-marital course called Happily Ever After which includes 125 questions every couple should ask before getting married. Sign up, we promise you won’t regret it!
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Connecting Question: If any issues come up in our relationship either before or after the wedding, would you be willing to see a counselor?
Talk about your expectations for your first year together.
It is crucial to marital success that you start out by laying all of your expectations, hopes, and fears out on the table. The more information your future spouse has going into your marriage, the better teammate and partner they can be. Talk about who is going to do what chore, what your expectations are for leisure time, and most importantly what your expectation is for frequency of sex and intimacy.
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Connecting Question: What are you most excited/ready for and what are you most anxious/apprehensive about when it comes to our upcoming marriage?
Recognize and acknowledge each other’s weaknesses.
Neither of you are perfect, and the sooner you get your weaknesses on the table, the better. Someone wise once said, “a team is only as strong as it’s weakest link”. If you want your marriage to be strong and healthy, you need to know what one another’s’ weaknesses are so that you know how you can best offer love and support to your partner.
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Connecting Question: What do you believe your greatest weakness is?
Make the 60 Second Blessing a daily habit.
The 60 Second Blessing is a great daily habit that we highly encourage here at Marriage365. Essentially, each partner get 60 seconds to tell the other what they love and appreciate about them that day. Just like daily vitamins make a strong body, this kind of daily affirmation will build strong bones for your marriage. Starting this BEFORE you say I do will build a strong sense of security and trust in your relationship.
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Connecting Question: What time each day is best for us to schedule our 60-second-blessing?
Plan a successful marriage, not just a beautiful wedding.
BONUS TIP: Connect with your future spouse every single day
Pick up a copy of our book 365 Connecting Questions for Engaged Couples and ask a question every day for an entire year (or ask them all at once, it’s up to you!). Get to know your future spouse in a new, fun and exciting way. We promise you won’t regret it!
Written by Anna Collins
Anna Collins lives in sunny Southern California with her husband and two children. She is passionate about her marriage, staying at home with her kids, writing, coffee, good conversation, and game night. Her life dream is to someday write a book and see it published.