Choose gratitude in every season of marriage to stay present and joyful.
Fight getting lost in life’s daily routine by actively choosing to express gratitude for your spouse. Take the time to truly value your marriage. Change things up, go the extra mile, and keep the heat going in the fireplace of your marriage!
1. Get your sexy on
Express thanks with your body. Pick a day this week to be physically intimate with your spouse. Decide ahead of time, do a little bit of planning, and surprise your spouse. Ladies, shave your legs. Men, shave your face the way your wife likes it. Wear clothing your spouse loves you in. Whatever the “norm” is in your marriage for sexual interaction, find a way to step it up. Set the mood by lighting candles, playing music, or making the bed. The physical times that are intentional are absolutely more pleasurable.
2. Write a love note
Written notes will never go out of style. Culturally, it seems like half of the interaction in marriage is through social media and emojis. Trust me, my husband sends me more emojis than I care for. ???? But the second he writes something sweet on a sticky note, my heart melts. Even more so when he goes the extra distance to write a card. Write out the reasons you’re grateful for your spouse. Start with, “I’m grateful for you and our marriage because…” Find the words to say thanks!
3. Participate in something your spouse enjoys
There’s surely an activity your spouse loves that you do not. Maybe it’s romantic movies, a particular type of food, or a certain experience. Now is the time to zip your lips on the negativity, plan something you know your spouse will enjoy, and decide to enjoy it as well. For example, my husband loves going to the movies. Although it isn’t my favorite way to spend our date money, when I choose to plan a movie date night, it means so much to him. Speak your spouse’s language and participate in something they love. They will appreciate the sacrifice you’re making.
4. Do what is asked of you
Okay, I know this particular one doesn’t sound very fun or sexy. But how pleased are you when you ask something of your spouse and they do it immediately with a smile? It makes such a difference when you do tasks intentionally and with thanks. Own your role as wife or husband and be the best one you can be. Take it further by doing something that has not been asked of you. Be agreeable. Remind yourself, “I’m picking up his socks because I love him.” Or, “ I’m doing the dishes because it makes my wife happy.” Meet your spouse’s immediate needs and simply say YES to a request.
5. Give a gift
How often do we purchase a random gift for our spouse without any occasion or prompting? Not that often if we’re honest. I can’t even recall the last time I purchased my husband a gift for no reason, which is why this is a perfect way to express my gratitude! Using your own pocket money to show a little love to your spouse goes a long way. Fight selfishness and think of your spouse. Surprise your partner with an unexpected and unprompted gift. Hint: If you’re looking for a great gift idea, and want to earn some serious bonus points with your spouse, check out our book, 365 Connecting Questions for Couples!
6. Dance together
Now I’ve got to be honest, this is something my husband and I have lacked recently. But I love it when he takes a moment to hold me close and look me in the eyes. Whether it’s in the kitchen or you’re attending a formal event, seize the moment. Get close and focus in on your love. The overall intent is to BE PRESENT. It is so easy to get lost in this media-rich, technology-filled, money-hungry world. So, take a few minutes to dance with your life partner.
7. Use the 60 Second Blessing
Be intentional out loud. Spend a little bit of time today brainstorming what you can say to your spouse to encourage them. Then take a full minute, with no distractions, to look into your spouse’s eyes speak life into them. This 60-second blessing will shift your focus into more positive light.
We’ve got to fight the discord in marriage. Gratitude can help cure anger, unforgiveness, and pain.
Whatever stress is currently upon your marriage, you have got to choose to stand against it. Choosing gratitude in marriage will turn your heart towards your spouse to bring you closer together. When I stop to think about the things in my husband I am grateful for, I magically forget about myself. Showing thanks turns our hearts outwards.
Written by Heather Christy
Heather Christy lives in Arizona with her husband Daniel. She is passionate about writing, reading, emotional growth and self-awareness. She enjoys coffee and honest conversation. She aspires to encourage marriages and love others through her writing.
