Jeramie and Carly Connor have been Marriage365 members for a little over 2 years now and we were lucky enough to meet them at our marriage retreat in May. Jeramie is a Captain and Commanding Officer in the Marines and Carly is a “military wife and mother”… we feel their life is one many can relate to.
They met at a vineyard in Kentucky when Carly saw “a cute boy” come around the corner. He instantly asked about her, and she conveniently made sure he knew who she was :). Soon after that, they went on their first date, but then a couple days later he left for 6 weeks for military training. They had to play old school and write letters to one another since phones were not allowed. Fast forward a year when they got engaged, and then married the next year. The first 18 months of marriage took them from Kentucky to Virginia, to Oklahoma, and to California, and were filled with both fun times as well as difficult times.
WHAT MADE YOU JOIN MEMBERSHIP?
CARLY – I actually purchased the Contagious Confidence course first, just for my own growth. Then I thought your posts on Instagram were so relatable and down to earth that I really wanted to join membership. Jeramie and I were not having problems, I just thought this was really great marriage stuff.
JERAMIE – When Carly asked if I wanted to watch a video with her, I really didn’t want to. I grew up with a stereotypical old-school definition of what a husband is. There weren’t a lot of emotions that were shown, and I felt like I worked, I supported the family, and therefore we were good – weren’t we??? I mean we weren’t bad. When I saw that membership is not like therapy and it’s so real and relatable… that’s when I started participating. And I learned that even though we are good, we could always be better.
WHAT MAKES A MILITARY MARRIAGE DIFFERENT AND WHY DO YOU THINK THEY STRUGGLE?
JERAMIE – There aren’t many careers that require the spouse to be gone for long periods of time as the military does, and that puts a strain on the marriage. The result is MISCOMMUNICATION and MISUNDERSTANDINGS! The spouse who is home definitely does way more than the one on assignment and that really gets overlooked. When I’m gone I can have a phone call with Carly, but then after that, I have a job to do and I can’t think about what is going on at home. Poor Carly is left to take care of everything from beginning to end.
CARLY – I think it’s easy to get frustrated and lonely, but military wives need to try to be patient and have understanding. Your husband doesn’t want to miss out on events like the birth of their child, birthdays, first steps, first days of school, and the list goes on. Keeping a routine and having a solid friend group and community has been a lifesaver for me.
WHAT HAS CHANGED OR IMPROVED IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP SINCE JOINING MEMBERSHIP?
Our communication!! We have both opened up with each other and are able to communicate where we normally wouldn’t have or would just move on without discussing how we are feeling.
The KNOWN position you taught us in Nashville has been a game-changer for us too! (Pssst…we are filming a video on this later this summer – stay tuned!)
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE THING ABOUT MEMBERSHIP?
We made a list…
The amount of resources available – so many topics for all couples from a relationship that is on its last straw to a pretty strong marriage and just wanting to keep it that way.
Love Language Challenge – we just did it and loved it! This has helped us so much to understand the difference between how we show love versus how someone wants to receive love. Such an eye-opening lesson for us.
The content is so relatable – I know we’ve already said that, but it really is!
The shorter videos – sometimes we just want a quick listen in the evening, not something long or heavy. The marriage quickies section is perfect for that.
ANYTHING YOU WOULD SAY TO SOMEONE STRUGGLING IN THEIR MARRIAGE?
If you want your marriage to work, then work on it! – Jeramie Connor
