Sex is a gift unique to your marriage!!
Think about it… You can communicate with your neighbor. You can work on a budget with your accountant. You can argue with a coworker. You can go on an adventure with your best friend. You can set boundaries with your family. But the one thing that is sacred, that you share with no other person but your spouse, is sexual intimacy AKA your sex life!
For many married couples, sex was once this amazing opportunity to express love for one another. But oftentimes your sex life can become complicated, mundane, or even nonexistent. We’ve been there. We made many mistakes in the first several years of our marriage, but we were able to break out of our sexual rut and we now have a thriving sex life (at least most of the time because, let’s be honest, every marriage experiences those dips in sexual desire)!
Here are 6 ideas from our FREE ebook 69 Ideas for Better Married Sex
#1 Show desire!
I intentionally chose this as the number one tip for good reason. Sexual intimacy is all about desire! If you’re annoyed, tired, or make comments like, “I’ll just lie here while you do your thing”, that’s a major turn off and it communicates to your spouse that you’re not really in the mood. Show them you want this! Show your spouse you want to please them and that you want them to please you!
#2 Write an erotic letter to your spouse
Spend a few minutes thinking about what you want to do to your spouse sexually. List the things you fantasize about and which body parts you love about them, and then write it all down. Read it to them and trust me – just talking about this will be a turn-on.
#3 Moan and use sensual breathing
Make an effort to be more vocal in the bedroom. If you like something, moan. If you really like something, try some sensual breathing so your spouse can hear it. It’s a major turn-on hearing your spouse moan and groan.
#4 Use your hands and tongue
A way to increase the intensity of oral sex is to use your hands at the same time you’re using your tongue. This takes some practice because it feels like a lot is going on at the same time. Just be sure your nails are filed and your hands are clean.
#5 Try edging
Edging is when you purposefully delay your orgasm. This is a challenging thing to do but once you try it, you’ll probably like it because it intensifies your orgasm. Once you stop penetration, give yourself about 20-30 seconds before continuing. Repeat this until you’re ready to orgasm.
#6 Try our 7-Day Sex Challenge
If you’ve never tried our sex challenge, you’re missing out. Each day you’ll watch a 1-2 minute video where we’ll give you a specific technique to incorporate in the bedroom. You’ll also get to hear our story of when we did our first sex challenge and it’s pretty funny!
Now that I got you all hot and bothered, I want to leave you with this one last reminder: the main goal for sex is connection. The orgasm, the sex position, the foreplay, the passion, the seduction… none of it matters as much as the emotional and physical connection you and your spouse will experience. If both of you feel loved, safe, and enjoy your time together, consider it a big win for your relationship.
Want to learn more? Get more ideas in our FREE ebook 69 Ideas for Better Married Sex
Become a Marriage365 member and get solutions for everyday couples. Anytime, Anywhere.
Written by Meygan Caston
Meygan Caston is the co-founder of Marriage365 and lives in Orange County, California with her husband Casey and their two children. She loves the beach, dance parties, writing, spa days, and helping couples connect in their marriage. Her life-long dream is to walk the Camino, have lunch with Brené Brown, and get on The Price is Right.
