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27 Ways To Immediately Connect With Your Spouse

In relationships, disconnect happens.

I would like to say disconnect never happens, but that’s unrealistic. We get selfish, we get busy, we mishandle and misplace our priorities, we say hurtful things, and we do things that imperfect people do because we are imperfect. We end up distant, if for a moment, a day, or an extended amount of time.

So, if you’re looking to instantly connect to your spouse and feel close to one another, here are some great ideas to try out:

  • Say “I am so thankful I married you because _______.”

  • Say “I think you’re sexy when you’re wearing or doing _________.”

  • Get naked and invite them into a hot shower with you.

  • Surprise your spouse at work with a coffee (if that’s allowed).

  • Say “I first loved you because ______ and I love you now because ______”.

  • Say “You first caught my eye when you _________ and I haven’t stopped thinking about you since.”

  • If you’re sitting on the couch far apart, intentionally move closer to your spouse to cuddle.

  • Walk hand in hand down the street or in the grocery store.

  • Initiate sex and don’t rush it.

  • Acknowledge out loud something your spouse has recently done that you appreciated and noticed, but maybe didn’t mention at the time.

  • Touch each other non-sexually for no other reason than just to be close.

  • Give your spouse a back massage without being asked.

  • Send flowers or an Edible Arrangement to your spouse’s office.

  • Text your spouse that you’re taking care of dinner and you love them.

  • Smile at your spouse, (Think about it, when is the last time you did?)

  • Run a bubble bath for your spouse to take while you put your kids to bed.

  • Have a babysitter arranged and take your spouse out for one-on-one time.

  • Send them a link in the middle of the day to a song that makes you think about them.

  • Walk up to your spouse and give them a long hug.

  • Randomly share a fond memory you remember sharing together.

  • Use a cheesy pick up line to make your spouse smile, then comment you’ll still do anything to make them laugh because you love them so much.

  • When your spouse gets home from work, ask a Connecting Question.

  • Send your spouse one of these 25 passionate texts.

  • Do something special that only makes sense to the two of you. (Recreate a first date, bring home your favorite take-out, bring up an old inside joke etc.)

  • Put your phone down, light candles during dinner, and talk to each other.

  • If possible to do without kids, suggest going for a drive together with no destination and enjoy the ride.

  • FLIRT! Flirting gets lost in between the day to day routine, which is a shame.


Written by Anna Collins
Anna Collins lives in sunny Southern California with her husband and two children. She is passionate about her marriage, staying at home with her kids, writing, coffee, good conversation, and game night. Her life dream is to someday write a book and see it published.


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69 Ideas for Better Married Sex

For many married couples, sex was once an amazing opportunity to express your love for one another. It was exciting, fun, and easy.  

But as time goes on, sex can become complicated, mundane, or even nonexistent.

We want to help you to enjoy sex for the gift it is — to be fully open, vulnerable, and connected with your spouse. This eBook will help you break out of sexual ruts and experience intimate connection like never before! 

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